What Are The Signs Of An Alpha Gamer?

Wondering how you can tell if someone is an alpha gamer? Worried you might be that someone? Well then, I’m here to help with these signs of an alpha gamer.

The signs of an alpha gamer are the following: telling everyone what to do, trying to win no matter what (AKA being a poor winner), getting upset when things don’t go their way (AKA being a sore loser), blaming others or other things, making others feel guilty for doing well or winning, not listening to others, always trying to be in charge or in control, trying to decimate their opponents, and any or all of the above happening more than once.

What Is An Alpha Gamer?

Before we get into the signs of an alpha gamer, we need to be clear on what an alpha gamer is. To that end, an alpha gamer is someone who tries to dominate how people play a board game. Alpha gamers will often tell others what to do, try to take control of the game, and think they know what’s best.

On the flip side, they can become upset if someone doesn’t listen to them if things don’t go their way, and they generally have a negative effect on the overall game experience.

So, how do you know someone’s being an alpha gamer?

The Signs Of An Alpha Gamer

There are quite a few signs someone is being an alpha gamer. Let’s start with the most telling (pun intended): telling everyone what to do.

Telling Everyone What To Do

This is usually what gives an alpha gamer away. Look, telling other people what to do in a game is okay when it’s done every now and then. It’s also okay if it’s done just to help them out (again, every now and then).

When it’s not okay is when someone, an alpha gamer, is frequently telling others what to do. They don’t even have to have a bad tone or attitude about it, it just has to happen many times during a game.

How many? That’s hard to say, but enough that it becomes noticeable in a bad way. Once is okay, twice is okay, even a few times, but when you start getting to that point when it feels like that’s all someone’s doing or all they’re waiting to do, even if they aren’t, that’s alpha gaming right there.

Also, even if it only happens once or twice, if it’s done with the intent of dominating someone’s turn or thinking you know best, instead of helping them to be their best, that’s alpha gaming.

Trying To Win No Matter What (AKA Being A Poor Winner)

Ever won a game and gloated about it? That doesn’t mean someone is an alpha gamer, but if your only goal is to win at all costs, even at the expense of others’ enjoyment of a game, then they might be one.

As with everything on this list (even the one below), there is nothing wrong with enjoying a win. There’s also nothing wrong with gloating a little.

I mean, you might’ve put a lot of work into that win. And who’s to say you’re gloating alone? If you won as a team, gloat away!

But when you’re only trying to win, when you’re always gloating, then that is a problem.

Getting Upset When Things Don’t Go Their Way (AKA Being A Sore Loser)

On the flip side of being a poor winner is being a sore loser. Funny enough, these two usually go hand-in-hand.

If an alpha gamer loses, they will not take it well. This doesn’t always mean getting vocal about it either. Sometimes, they can become withdrawn, sullen, and seem moody.

However they go about it though, it does put a drag on the game night.

Blaming Others Or Other Things

Going right along with being a sore loser, if an alpha gamer does start to get vocal after a loss or if they’re afraid they’re going to lose, then they’ll often begin blaming people or things.

For the most part, most alpha gamers are socially savvy enough to only blame the games for their “bad mechanics,” “bad design,” etc. But, occasionally, they can start blaming others too, even sneakily so with such comments as, “Man, you’re so lucky,” or “What are you even doing?!”

Making Others Feel Guilty For Doing Well Or Winning

Otherwise known as the guilt trip, this tactic is used to make others play less well or enjoy their victories less than before. That way, either the alpha gamer will have a better chance of winning, or they won’t have to feel as bad when they lose.

Not Listening To Others

Playing with other people is always awesome because you get to see what ideas they have as well as your own. You get different perspectives on moves, get to see different strategies in action, and get to hear different takes on games.

In short, it’s a lot of fun!

However, alpha gamers will struggle with this. They don’t want to hear what others have to say, and they don’t want any suggestions because that makes them feel like they’re not good enough, that they’re smaller than others. This scares them, so they just don’t listen.

Always Trying To Be In Charge/Control

This goes along with telling other people what to do and not listening to others, but alpha gamers have a need to be in control. They want to make as many decisions as possible, have as much input as possible, be in charge, and so on.

Visibly Salivating At The Prospect Of Destroying Someone In A Game

I was originally going to write this as a joke, and then I realized while the “visibly salivating” part was a joke, the rest of it wasn’t. Part of being an alpha gamer is revelling in victory. And not just any kind of victory either but in the kind where you absolutely decimate your opponents.

Admittedly, I don’t think this is always a part of alpha gaming. After all, alpha gamers want to play games too, and they recognize that to do that they need people to be their friends. But there are those times when their competitive drive just gets the best of them, and they go after their friends (now seen as only opponents) like a wolf after a piece of meat.

It’s not pretty, and it’s not fun for the people who are the meat. Seriously, if you do this, don’t treat your friends like meat. It’s not okay. Bad dog.

All Of The Above Happens More Than Once

Someone can be a one-time alpha gamer. It happens to the best of us. We get immersed in a game or just try to help out and we forget ourselves.

It happens.

But true alpha gamers are the ones who do it often. Not every game, but enough times that it starts to, sadly, become their reputation.

What Can Be Done About An Alpha Gamer When You Notice The Signs?

What you do about an alpha gamer depends on your relationship with that person outside of when they alpha game.

If they’re your friend, you politely help them to understand what they’re doing and how it’s having a negative effect on the game. If that doesn’t work, it’s time for a more serious conversation.

And if they’re not your friend, say a person at a local game night you don’t see all that often, you can wait until the game’s over, then play games with others.

Whatever you do though, it’s important to do it as soon as possible. Alpha gamers who aren’t shown the boundaries won’t stop alpha gaming.

So, whether it’s just saying, “Hey, thanks for the advice. However, I’m going to take my own turn,” or it’s being a little more forceful by saying something like, “We’re all here doing our best. If I need some help, I’ll ask, okay?” you’ll want to do it as soon as possible. An alpha gamer won’t like it, but that doesn’t mean they won’t respect it. And if they don’t, then I refer you back to my point about playing games without them.

Did You Know?

(Each time you refresh the page you will get a new “Did You Know” fact!)

Did you know unboxing board games can be really enjoyable to some people? Me included! Check out my thoughts here!

Conclusion: What Are The Signs Of An Alpha Gamer?

So, those are all the signs I’ve noticed in an alpha gamer. What about you though? Can you think of anything? If so, let me know in the comments below!

Also, if you have any tips for handling this type of situation, I’d love to hear those too!

And, as always, keep on gaming, fellow board gamers.